Alone time

I personally feel alone time is important. It gives me a chance to unwind and relax. Time to cry over silly videos, or play FarmTown. I also find that if I don't get it, I can be quite the bear.

I try to relax before I go to bed every night, or if I get sometime in the morning before Mom wakes up. And if she gets into this new program, I'm actually going to get a bit of time for myself during the day. I love mornings where I can relax with my coffee and go through FaceBook (or Twitter). It doesn't happen as often as I need it to.

Before the boys were born, I would take long hot bubble baths with a good book, usually while Jim was off fishing. That of course was before the internet, before chat rooms and message boards and social media. Way before I could leave a review on Amazon. The advances that have been made aren't always for the best when one can't prioritize.

Today I can go to FlyLady.com and read about how to organize my life as a flybaby while ignoring the housework that needs to be done. I can go to Pinterest and pin organizational ideas, recipes I may or not make, fruity drinks to relax that I know I won't taste. I can join message boards and groups to complain about the lack of help I get from my family and get tips I won't use to try to force them. And I can come here and blog about everything I'm not doing.

I can search movie reviews for shows I won't see. I can throw my two cents into the ring of a political debate. I can find out how my third cousin twice removed is recovering from her wart surgery. All while sitting at the table sipping my chocolate caramel columbine brew.

Honestly, I don't know what I would do without the internet today. I can check my bank account, pay my bills, keep in touch with friends and family, read the news, watch my favorite shows, and have my son message me from upstairs for his medication. I can make appointments, order ferret food, shop for shoes, and tell Jim to stop for bread. It's become a huge part of every day life.

I know there's a trend to "unplug". But I use it so often for different things going on with Jamey that for me honestly, it would be better if I could find the balance between obsession and it being a basic tool of life. I don't have a phone book, I google places. I don't have reference books for medications (and they change so often!) so it's google again. If I forget to mail a payment, I jump on the website. If I can't remember an appointment, I jump on his UPMC Portal.

How do you balance things out? What's your favorite thing to do to unwind?



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I guess I'm actually supposed to fill this out. I'm a passionate medical mom of a 19 year old liver/CRPS patient. My goal with my blog is to raise awareness for his conditions. And to hash out my feelings about it. There are a lot of raw emotions when your life is suddenly stalled by any illness, let alone your child's illness. 

I'm also attempting to either "find myself" or "remake myself". So much of my time and energy goes into caring for both my mother (end stage COPD) and son, along with trying to be Mom to my younger son and a wife, that most of the time I feel lost. I tend to put myself on a back burner and right now I'm burning out. 

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